slut shaming = wrong.
getting angry at someone for cheating on their partner and/or having meaningless sex while aware that it means something to the other person and possibly doing this with many, many people over any given period of time = having moral boundaries.
yknow today at my na meeting we read the first step from the basic text. something that stuck out to me in particular read, “Most of us are relieved to find out we have a disease instead of a moral deficiency.” it’s kind of ironic that i ran into this post pretty much right when i got home.
i made some pretty stupid decisions when i was using, but it wasn’t a lack of boundaries in my morals. it was because my thinking was skewed. and although this post makes a point, it still is dehumanizing to women and all people, really, who make mistakes and who might be suffering from something else like a mental disorder of any kind.
although i’m not using any more and i do know that my actions while using were unfavorable, i stand by my thoughts that everyone’s actions are their actions and nobody has the right to be angry or upset at someone who makes those decisions. (i’m reading a book about codependency right now, and this post really relates to the book, addiction, skewed thoughts and feelings, and so forth.) so if you really want to stop shaming of any kind, this needs to be stopped.
you don’t need to be friends with people who make decisions like this, but this doesn’t mean they have no morals, a moral deficiency, are a bad person, etc.
the idea of addiction being a disease is very controversial and while i agree that ones thinking is very skewed while using, that doesn’t mean they aren’t responsible for the people they hurt in the process. (this post wasn’t directed at you at all btw i really hope you didn’t think that). i dont see the post as shaming or dehumanizing someone for a mental disease or addiction that made them act a certain way. you should read the book a million little pieces when you have the time because the protagonist really struggles with accepting AA values because he doesnt agree with addiction being a disease totally out of your control. also i obviously have never been addicted to drugs so im limited to what ive witnessed and heard, and this post isnt aimed particularly at people who are addicts and indirectly hurt people due to it.
i know this post wasn’t directed at me especially because you weren’t the original poster. and i do believe that addiction is a disease, personally, but that it is one’s original thought process that begins it. i know i hurt people, and i know that i lost a lot of friends and stuffs like that. but i didn’t tell anyone to be hurt by it, or make anyone feel anything.
although i understand people being hurt by others actions because i am a codependent myself and want to control others even if its not in a manipulative and vindictive manner.
also, i understand this post wasn’t directed at addicts or people with mental disorders, but that was my take on the post and how it affected me and my thought process now (as a recovering addict with 3mos clean this saturday). it only hurt my feelings because i am a defensive brat with too much guilt that i don’t know what to do with. but i ultimately shouldn’t feel guilty, because i believe it wasn’t my fault in the long run. i suffered (am still am suffering) from codependency which caused long years of depression and self-loathing due to my mother’s relapse and constant drug use. but then again, was that really her fault either? it’s a never-ending cycle of confusion and misunderstanding.
so yes, i know this post wasn’t directed at me. i was just expressing my thoughts on it, 6mos after the original argument, in a new light.
10:45 pm 74 notes
remember when i was funny me neither (no but seriously remember when i was humorous lmfao fuck man)
9:34 pm
when you reply to posts with your opinion thats actually well thought-out and means a lot to you personally and then nobody reads it/cares wow the internet sucks now
9:16 pm
9:12 pm 1,328 notes
slut shaming = wrong.
getting angry at someone for cheating on their partner and/or having meaningless sex while aware that it means something to the other person and possibly doing this with many, many people over any given period of time = having moral boundaries.
yknow today at my na meeting we read the first step from the basic text. something that stuck out to me in particular read, “Most of us are relieved to find out we have a disease instead of a moral deficiency.” it’s kind of ironic that i ran into this post pretty much right when i got home.
i made some pretty stupid decisions when i was using, but it wasn’t a lack of boundaries in my morals. it was because my thinking was skewed. and although this post makes a point, it still is dehumanizing to women and all people, really, who make mistakes and who might be suffering from something else like a mental disorder of any kind.
although i’m not using any more and i do know that my actions while using were unfavorable, i stand by my thoughts that everyone’s actions are their actions and nobody has the right to be angry or upset at someone who makes those decisions. (i’m reading a book about codependency right now, and this post really relates to the book, addiction, skewed thoughts and feelings, and so forth.) so if you really want to stop shaming of any kind, this needs to be stopped.
you don’t need to be friends with people who make decisions like this, but this doesn’t mean they have no morals, a moral deficiency, are a bad person, etc.
(via mopeyteen)
9:09 pm 74 notes
8:47 pm 8,503 notes
And here’s the first page of my new book. White text on left reads, “I walk home without you.”
(via fabdomen)
